Everybody wants to be sexy...

...no one wants to build up character.
People want to get sexy. They want to be sexy. Character building takes too much time and effort. It requires dying to oneself, being open to fall and learn, but people don't want to be uncomfortable. They want to belong to a certain category they think has some power of influence over other people. They want to get to a point where they don't have to justify anything they do, because they are simply "famous", admired, and looked up to. "Who are you to say what I should or shouldn't do"? It doesn't matter what they have to give up to become sexy, as long as they can build this perfect shape they aspire to, that will discard all sorts of "difficulties" they see in their way of getting a good catch and thus, admiration, respect and awe from others. They become slaves to this public opinion of them, and obey promptly any commandment they receive to change themselves, because they are simply not good enough. They are predictable.

And it's not even only about the shape anymore. People call other people sexy, when they do things, looks or moves that catch other people's attention. Not in a healthy way, however, but in a compromising way. That way, someone who doesn't think he/she could get a partner the proper way, will turn to other means, that being, ridiculously degrading attempts of getting attention. From this desperation comes mainly immorality and all sorts of sick non-sense.

People don't want to deal with obstacles. They want to go around them. They want to be comfortable. No commitment, no need to think about anything that a real relationship involves. People want casual sex. And even the people that don't want that kind of sex, like to know that if they did, they'd have a shot at it.

People want to be sexy. And not simply having a good appearance, but showing they are irreverent, and by that, they mean "free". Sexy has become a synonym for interesting, which is definitely an erroneous equation. I can more easily resist to charming, flawless beauty, than to the scent of greatness that comes from a woman with character and integrity. But all people do is show they are easy to get. Like a vault that can be easily open, if one simply takes the time to try every possible key that already lies on the floor, right in front of it. People have become cheap.

There is no passion. There is no love. No compassion, no feeling. Actually, there is an endless search for a feeling, which they can never satisfy. People "got a feeling that tonight's gonna be a good night", and they aren't afraid to say that all they hope to get is money spent on drinks that will knock them out of their conscience, so they'll be open to engage in mutual degradation(watch the music video, if you think I'm being too harsh). There's nothing charming, sexy or appealing in getting wasted; nothing respectable or admirable in being deliberately out of one's conscience. What good is the "fun", if you depend on alcohol to have it and then can't even remember it afterwards?

The funny part is, Christians stand and applause, and even dance and sing to it. What a way to rejoice in the Lord, I must say. Why didn't we think of that earlier? Celebrating our freedom by locking ourselves again to malice with the old chains we once were freed from. In this oversexed society, we don't laugh at them, we don't cry because of them, we laugh with them! And that's conformity. We want to do many things in Jesus' name, yet we can't even honor our own. They are all about flirting and seducing. But we should be all about blessing and producing fruits. People are pitiful. And I include myself, of course, because I'm not really talking about people here. I'm talking about what they stand for and what they defend.

And it's not about the music. There is also great godly club music, but christians take no interest on it, like Tedashii said: "we understand that sin is much more appealing/.../they don't want that godly music, but naughty music/that party music, that make-you-shake-your-body music/and you don't have to leave the church to find music that will put you to work."

People think about things they have heard throughout their short life, that easily penetrated their minds: we only got one life to live; there is no absolute truth; the right thing to do is simply whatever pleases your heart; listen to your heart, because it knows what's right; life is too short to complicate it by being prudent. Those are things an "open-minded" person would surely agree to and defend. The problem is that the mind is so open, it can't even see that the majority of the things that come in are pure trash-talking. There's no sense of filtering of the stuff that comes in. People simply take in all they can get, as long as it feels good.

"Just dump your trash on me, and I'll feed myself with it until I throw up, and then I'll feed myself again from that, which I puked". Yes, we return to our vomits, nurturing old habits we said we'd left behind. We make the same mistakes hopping for a different outcome. That's nonsensical.

And we are fully aware of that fact, but taking the time to change doesn't seem a logical thing to do in the youth. Maybe further on, when my vigor has left me, when I can't perform any of such acts anymore. "Then I'll try to change, since I'll have no other choice. For now, I'll just hide and ignore that knowledge of my inconsistency and irrelevance. I'll do my best to have all the experiences I fantasize about, until I can't take it anymore. And the truths about me that aren't advantageous for my reputation, well, I'll keep those as secrets, while I blackmail those who know about these things so they will keep quiet about my dirty little secrets". The best way to avoid people finding out dirty little secrets about you is to have none at all.

People don't only search for a satisfaction of the carnal desires. They also long to have intimacy and they think by being sexy, by being wanted and getting to get intimate with desirable people, they'll satiate this longing. People crave to feel they have something to offer, something to bargain with; something that brings other people closer to them, that draws people to them, something to be admired, even if its just an opinion about a senseless subject. People want to be heard. But in reality, a person who has intimacy with a lot of people, doesn't have it with anyone. So, people degrade themselves to feel valued. That's illogical. In order to become famous, many people become infamous. In order to be honored, they dishonor other people, regardless of any justice, compassion or love.

No one likes to feel left aside, to be outsourced, to be left-behind, retired. Well, you want to stand out, shine and be noticed? Keep it simple and truthful. That way, you will be building your life upon a rock. Character outshines sexiness. And people say they don't understand why their relationships don't work. Well, it's all built on sand, with no real roots, with nothing to keep it firm. Try to invest in faithfulness.

What a great thing it is, to find out that something or someone you pledged faithfulness to is indeed more than you could ever expect. My watch glows in the dark. But just strong enough for me to see the twelve little points and the pair of pointers. No one else needs to see it. And I never expected it to do so. I met it in plain light, being showed off among hundreds of others. I sympathized with it, it matched my starting expectations of having no digital display or anything, being affordable but still having a scent of distinguishedness. It accompanied me to places not even my closest friends have accompanied me. It endured hard days of work, being consulted more than a friend could bare. It's gratifying to discover that your effort, trying to remain faithful to it, since there is also no reason not to, was taken into consideration.

People are scared of being faithful, because they believe they will miss out on many "fun" things in life. They fear that sticking with the person you love will make them boring, predictable and somehow limited. Well, faithfulness is not about being predictable. It's about being reliable and trustworthy. And it pays off. And love is not about good intentions. It's about taking a stand, beside someone or for someone or something. In love, there is no fear, because love draws away fear. There is no place for fear, in true love. No fear of being betrayed, no fear of feeling underestimated, of becoming uninteresting to one another.

We all seek treasures. Most of us try to store up treasures here on earth, by getting their "trophies": the hottest spouse, the hottest house, the hottest style and reputation, the hottest everything they can put their hands on and that, in a selfish way, just to show off and show others how awesome they are. We, as christians, should not waste our times on little things like that. We should store up treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. We should strive to honor God with all we have, and seek a decent life, a decent spouse, a decent everything, so we can bless others, in an unselfish way.

Now, building up character is hard to do, because it takes time, sacrifice and a lot of humility. God teaches us things the whole time, everyday, putting us to the test or blessing us. Every scar and every testimony we have serves as a reminder of the things we should learn out of those experiences. Building takes many pieces of construction material, placed in the right place, at the right time. And sometimes we see some missing pieces and we want to get them done, but it's still not the time to go through that experience and learn that lesson. A constructor has to always have in mind a visualization of the finished building, so he can believe it's possible to accomplish, but also, so that he can guide himself through every step, without forgetting anything or skipping an important phase. Most times, we don't see what we're supposed to learn, because we're blinded by our limited vision, our pride, our faults. But once in a while, we have an epiphany, and we're able to comprehend all that God had already showed us, and link every event, to get the whole picture. Some people call it inspiration, when they take this epiphany and write a song, a text or something. I call it God's way of speaking to us. 

The moment people decide to get sexy, they are agreeing to be disrespected, by creating adulterous thoughts on weak-minded people's minds(and we are all weak-minded by nature). Being sexy implies being the object of desire of someone, that wants to have sex with you or simply "desirable for sex". Now, I'm not sure about you, but I don't want people to see me with those eyes. I want people to look me in the eye, as I do with them, and see through the window of my soul what I'm all about, and not to look at me as an object of pleasure. I rather be admired by trying to build up character. And when you're filled with the Holy Spirit, you give fruits of the Spirit, and people start to say: "I don't know what it is, but there is something very good about you".

So, I am everyday more willing to be healthy, not only in my mind and heart, but also physically. But I try to always have this verse from 1 Timothy 4.8 on my mind: "For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come". And I think of this other verse: "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you". And that means, all things I need will be added to me. Not only finantially, spiritually, materialistically, but also emotionally, a spouse that will enrich my life, both in mind and body, and the proper, unbreakable bond between us, that will make sexiness secondary.

Don't try to rush things through sexiness. It doesn't have to be this way. God has something better for us. He has higher standards. He doesn't point the finger to show how uncapable we are. He wants to help us get there. Be patient. Everything in life has its right time. Don't make a grand-opening of a building without finishing it. It would be otherwise unfulfilling. Try to enjoy every step of the way, because it will happen probably just once. The best music artist is not the one who simply creates great songs, but the one who performs them in a good way, in the right order, with the proper transitions, so he won't break the mood created by a song and lose all its meaning. We should too, make decent transitions between every song of your life, the youth, adulthood, marriadge, best years of your life. They could make apparently decent songs separately, but they'll make more sense when played in the right order, at the right time, each with its joys and failures, without skipping any step of the growth. Then you will be able to live an abundant life, making the best of the few years you're stuck on this earth, preparing to make the best of each day of eternity, once this world has passed.

Selah